Why you should never shout at a chef or scream abuse at a waiter

Consumerism has gone mad. The levels to which almost any industry will bend itself to please its customers have soared to almost unbelievable heights. No more so than the catering trade.
Customers firmly believe that it is their god-given right to get one-hundred percent satisfaction, one-hundred percent of the time. Sure and why not? After all the average consumer works hard for his money and rightfully expects to get a good return for their expenditure.
But to honestly think that you have the right to shout, swear and act like a spoilt brat if your dish arrives to the table late or slightly cold is preposterous. The amount of times I have seen clients screaming, shouting and going red in their face never ceases to amaze me. You see it everywhere you go; in the branded cafes on the high street, in the tailored, 'one-off' restaurants, in the fast food joints and in the upper-class restaurants with celebrity chefs.

Don't pretend you're not guilty of acting like this yourself, you won't fool me and you won't fool yourself.

It's inexcusable.

Do you have any idea how hard the chefs work for you behind the closed doors of the kitchen? Do you really appreciate what a 70 hour week of blood, sweat, tears and heartache really implies? Chefs live a stress-ridden life that never ceases and because they love the food they'll continue to slave to their passions and their slim wage-checks.

Just don't expect to get off scot-free should you return the food with acidic comments of sarcasm and ill-manners. The chefs will make you pay in ways you'll never really be wise to.

And trust me...I've seen it all.

From simple spitting in the food, to wiping chicken breasts across genitals to spiking the gravy with laxative. It happens and more often than not you'll never realise it...or if you do it'll doubtless be too late.
Chefs will take out their pent up frustrations and rage upon you; the irate, rude and badly mannered customer.
Never, ever think there won't be repercussions for your unreasonable, self-imposed rights to shout and scream.

And if you have a problem? If your creme brulee arrives with a hair in it, if your steak arrives rare instead of medium, or your stylish, neo-cuisine soup arrives luke warm instead of cold? Tell the waiter, inform him or her you have a problem, smile and politely ask if it would be possible to remedy the problem. The waiter will be delighted to sort it out, the chef will be understanding and only too keen to do honour to the food and you'll have your dish returned to you in no time at all.
Politeness, good will and a smile will get you the world. Harsh words, pointed sarcasm and brash manners will only deliver you unwanted and unhygienic ingredients in your food